I don't mean I want to go shovel snow, or trudge around the neighborhood in twenty-four layers.  I don't want long hikes or camping.  I don't want to go looking for the best photograph, or the perfect view.  I don't mean I want to work in the garden (I do, but not right this moment… cuz it's buried under a foot of snow), or continue digging for the Crazy, Insane Garden Project.  I want to go Play Outside!

I want to go out with no expectations.  I want to come home covered in mud and scratches.  I want to find a perfect stick.  I want to discover a small stream, just new from the rain, and know my afternoon is all booked up.  I want to see a deer and stand so still it ignores me and then clap my hands.  I want to chase squirrels and climb trees.  I want to climb down the stormdrain and pretend I'm exploring the lost temple of Xxivks (pronounced drit for no apparent reason).

I think we get so caught up in the idea of work and responsibilities we forget about unstructured play.  We "play" games with rules and scores.  We exercise and workout and we need a goal.  Everything has a schedule and a plan.

Maybe I just need some new playmates, but surely there is still time for random, unplanned fun?  Running because it's fun or standing on your head or doing summersaults and cartwheels and rolling down a hill?

Maybe I should just go out dancing.  That's fun, but these days I feel this pressure to meet someone, or HAVE FUN and get my money's worth, or gripe about the dj, or not make a fool of myself on the dance floor, or I go out so rarely it seems like a Big Deal.  I don't want fun and play to be a Big Deal, thinking like that makes me feel old and tired.

Feeling old and tired makes you old and tired.  Fun and games may not keep you young, but it will look that way, and feel that way  - and isn't that more important?

I suppose it's cabin fever, or spring fever, or some such thing.  Too long cooped up, even the (indoor) cats want to get out, till they see the snow.  I'm twitching for an adventure, something completely random.  It's even too cold for ghost hunting, which I find a bit redundant cuz they are everywhere, and everyone thinks I'm nuts for wanting to bring a net.  At least I'd get to see new and interesting places full of terror, screaming and scaring other people.

You'd think working all the psychic fairs would be fun, and some are, but it's still work.  Besides, you do one simple handstand (I was bored) and people talk about it for years.

Don't get me wrong, I love what I do and in many ways I have the greatest and most exciting job in the world.  I just have cabin fever and I am going bonkers.

So talk to be people, who else is going crazy out there?  Are you climbing the walls?  If so, are you using crampons or ropes?

What are you doing to relieve the winter doldrums or are you loving it with a yard covered in snow angels and snowmen?

I'll open a discussion in the Forum at GreatConjunction.org – tell us what you are doing or just complain about the weather for a bit.  What is keeping you going as you look out the window?

My Grandmother has passed away.  She was a woman of faith who loved, and was loved by, her family and community... and I miss her terribly.

In Memorium - Edith Mae Thornton, 86

Edith M. Thornton, 86, of Park Vista Independent Retirement Center, and previously of Lowellville, passed way peacefully Sunday afternoon at Hospice House after a short illness.

Edith was born Sept. 25, 1923 in Youngstown, a daughter of Harry and Rhoda McElwain.  She graduated form Rayen High School and married the late James F. Thornton on June 16, 1945.  James passed away July 9, 1994.

Edith leaves two sisters, Eleanor Dicks of Zephyrhills, Florida and Eileen Davis of Hubbard and a brother Walter McElwain is deceased.

Edith also leaves three sons, James S. (Janet) Thornton of Boardman, David H. (Paulette) Thornton of Poland Twp., Gerald E. Thornton of Lowellville, and a daughter Marilyn J. (Andrew) Acierno of Liberty.

In addition, she will be missed by nine grandchildren, Nicole (Steve) Cain, Andrea (Robert) Neff, Gerald (Megan) Thornton, Lori (Bradley) Timko, John M. Thornton, Lisa (Guy) Young, Summer Thornton, Michele (James) Dierkes, and Melissa (Emmanuel) Vlahos.

Also eight great-grandchildren, Katrina Neff, Andrew Neff, Elizabeth Neff,  twins Kyle and Nathan Cain, Nikolas Young, Ava Timko, and Xander Thornton.

Edith was a very active member of Richard Brown Memorial Methodist Church, and before that, in the McGuffey Methodist Church.  She sang in the choir, served on many committees and was active in United Methodist Women and the Mothers Club.  She was very committed to family and especially enjoyed family gatherings and the great-grandchildren. She will be greatly missed by her family.

Her hobbies included knitting, needlepoint  and roller skating with her husband.

Calling will be at 5 p.m. to 8 p.m. Friday at the Thompson Funeral Home (4221 Market Street, Youngstown, OH, 44512-1119, (330) 788-6568).  Friends may also call from 10 to 11 a.m. Saturday at Richard Brown Church  (1205 Elm Street, Youngstown, OH, 44505, 330-743-5432).  A Service will be held at the church 11 a.m.

The family requests that tributes be contributed to Richard Brown United Methodist Church.

My talk at ULE was a blast and will be available for sell on DVD first quarter of 2010, although I did discover that suits seem to scare the heck out of fairgoers.  Who knew?  Then, off to Rochester for readings and networking with my New York peeps, leading to a booking in January for radio with Michelle.  Right away off to Texas to see family and help my Aunt after her heart surgery, she's doing much better.  One day at the Warren fair before the travel caught up with me and I crashed, but some good readings.  Then three days in Sandusky at Midnight Moon and Karen's Wellness Center, both leading to spring classes: Auras – the Light Fantastic at Midnight Moon and Your Spiritual Toolkit – Psychic Development Intensive at Karen's.  Finally, Victory of Light in Cincinnati where I attempted to give readings in a noisy hallway because they lost my paperwork.  Blerg.

Funny thing at Victory of Light though, the second day the reader across the way comes over with her head hung low to say, "I need to apologize to you."

"Fer what?  Why, what did you do?"

"For years," she said, "I've been telling people that no one can 'see auras' and Spirit Artists are all frauds, but seeing you work has changed my mind.  I believe that you are the real deal and see those energies.  I am so very sorry."

I looked at her for a minute and said, "Hey, no worries.  If it makes you feel any better, I've said some less than kind things about angel readers."

Cuz the technique is always less important that the person doing the reading.  There are amazing psychics and readers out there giving incredible readings with the strangest methods and others who will sit and read you a Tarot interpretation right out of a book and call it a reading.  Talk to people, get recommendations and remember not to talk down any particular style because you never know who is out there giving the most incredible readings using two twigs and a glass of water.